Animal Insting

Today is Halloween, which is a holiday that we don't really like much at our house.  The reason why we don't like it is because on the night of Halloween, lots of children come to our neighborhood, and they all have shrill, screaming voices, and they run up to the door and ring the doorbell, even if Mom is already at the door, and then all the kids yell, "Trick or treat!" and Mom has to give them candy.  This whole thing happens over and over all evening, and it is Very Stressful for us dogs because we're not used to children, and we think they are scary and annoying.

Besides which, Mel and Barry feel that they have to Guard the House, so whenever someone comes to the door, they bark a lot and want to go attack the intruders, so Mom has to put Mel and Barry in a bedroom with the door closed or else tie them to the piano, so that they can't bite anybody.

Then on top of everything else, Mom is giving away all this yummy-smelling candy, but she won't give any to us dogs because it has chocolate in it, which is POISONOUS to dogs, as I told you before.  And we don't even know where all these children come from because they don't live in our neighborhood, but they arrive in vans and cars, and they all want candy, and even though they come with their moms and dads, who tell them to say "Thank you," it still makes you wonder why they don't have any candy in their own neighborhood.

And the other thing we don't like about Halloween is that we are usually trying to watch TV or a DVD or something, but we have to stop every 5 or 10 minutes because all these kids are coming to the door.  And Gabe and I like to take a nap on the sofa while we're watching TV, but we keep getting woken up by trick-or-treaters.  So we are really glad when Mom runs out of candy, which she always does, and usually by 8 p.m., and then we can turn off the porch light and hope that no more kids are dumb enough to come to the door, even though a few still sometimes do.

So that's why we don't like Halloween.  But I will just say that at least Mom doesn't make any of us dogs wear costumes, because that would be SO humiliating!  Some people make their dogs wear costumes, and some dogs have actually told me they don't mind doing this, but I would hate it if I had to wear some dorky costume.  Which is why I am glad that I have such a nice mom who doesn't do that kind of abusive stuff to her dogs!

Some people in our neighborhood put up a whole bunch of decorations for Halloween, but we don't do that.  At the house in the next block, there is a great big cemetery in their yard.  I've posted a couple of pictures of it.  I have to tell you a secret, though.  This cemetery is not real!  If it were real, all the dogs in town would be there, eating the bones of the skeletons, but the bones are all plastic, so they are not good to eat.

Henry's people, who live nextdoor to us, also made a cemetery.  Their cemetery is smaller, and it's not real either.  Maybe the kids who go around asking for candy are fooled by these fake cemeteries, but dogs know the difference so we are not fooled for even one minute!


Well, now I will tell you about something even scarier than Halloween.  It's about Mel.  He had to go visit Dr. Patricia yesterday, which is always scary.  The reason why Mel had to go there is because he got a boo-boo between his toes.  Here's a picture of it:



Mom thought maybe it was something called an interdigital cyst, which is vet-speak for "a growth between the toes."  But Dr. Patricia said it wasn't that.  She thinks it is probably just a regular boo-boo that Mel got somehow, and the reason it hasn't healed up is because he keeps licking it.  So now he has to wear a Bite-Not Collar for a WHOLE WEEK so that he won't lick his foot.  After that, if his owie heals up, we'll know it was just a regular owie, but if it doesn't heal up, it might be Cancer.  And how's THAT for scary?

Right now we are in the Season of Dead Leaves.  This season occurs in the autumn, which I already wrote about in my blog before, so I'm not going to say anything more about it right now.







Here's a list I made of some of the good things about dead leaves:
1.  They look pretty while they are falling down from the trees.
2.  They look pretty on the ground, unless they are boring, brown dead leaves.
3.  They make excellent places to pee and poop.
4.  They make nice blankies for plants during the winter.
5.  They rot and turn into dirt and make the dirt better for growing plants.


And here are some not-so-good things about dead leaves:
1.  They can kill the grass if they stay there too long.
2.  They have to be raked up and put in bags and taken away by one of those big, noisy trucks.
3.  They stick to your feet, so you track them into the house, and then you have to rake the floor, too.
4.  If we poop in the leaves, Mom has trouble finding the poop and picking it up.
5.  They are noisy to walk in, so it's hard to sneak up on a squirrel.
I guess dead leaves are necessary because if the old leaves didn't die, then the new leaves couldn't grow in the spring.  And anyway, piles of dead leaves are really special and I like to pee in them!  Both boy and girl dogs can pee in a pile of leaves, which is not true of a fire hydrant, for instance, which only boy dogs can pee on.  And if you pee in a pile of leaves, then the interesting scent stays there a long time, especially if the leaves are damp.  And any other dog that comes along can tell that you've been there, which is Very Important for them to know.

Well, I'm tired of talking about leaves now, so I think I will take a little nap.  And anyway, I have to dream up a topic to write about tomorrow.